Big Xs (More On Doing It Badly)
Monday, October 1st, 2007
The other day I was bemoaning my woes to my friend M over the phone. I’ve been in a difficult patch for awhile with a creative project, and I keep trying to remember that it’s supposed to get like this. In childbirth, there always comes a time when you think you just can’t go on any longer, and this usually means that you’re getting near the end. It’s the same with creative work. Sometimes it gets really really hard, and you just have to wait it out, trust that you’re approaching the finish line and if you can just keep going, you’ll get there.
But I’m tired of waiting it out.
So I emailed M and complained. He wrote back and told me about a poetry class he’s been taking taught by a famous Winnipeg poet. This teacher assigned a half-hour poem in the class and wrote right along with them. M said he watched her fill up 3 pages to his one, and most of it had big Xs through it by the end. His point being that he had been trying to do it perfectly and not getting very far, while she was just filling up paper and finding the poem in the middle of all the mess.
“So you too.” He wrote to me. “Write something so you can put a big X through it.”
To remind myself, I put some things up on my bulletin board: pages with lots of red scribbles and crossed out words, lots of big Xs.
It felt cleansing and reminded me that sometimes when I’m at my most creative and productive, it’s because my only goal is to make something terrible, and often it turns into something good
Then I found THIS and was inspired to make more scribbles. Honoring scribbles as creative output… I love it!
Where do you need more Xs in your life?
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